Before You Judge, Pause

Let’s face it, we all judge. It happens almost instantly: a snap opinion about someone’s behavior, a silent assumption about their choices, even a harsh thought about ourselves. It’s human. And it’s not something we can fully switch off. But what if we didn’t try to eliminate judgment? What if we just started noticing it and paused before running with it?That’s what I’ve been working on lately.

It’s in that pause, just a breath or a moment of awareness, that something powerful happens. Instead of reacting automatically, I’ve started asking myself: What else could be going on here? What don’t I know about this person’s situation? What would happen if I stayed curious instead of assuming I’m right? When I choose curiosity, I open a door. Suddenly, I’m not stuck in the loop of my own conclusions. I’m available to learn, to listen, and sometimes to be surprised.

Empathy follows naturally. When I remind myself that most people are doing the best they can, especially when I can’t see their full story, I soften. It doesn’t mean I agree with every choice or excuse bad behavior. It just means I’m approaching it from a more human place. And self-compassion? That’s a big one. Because often, the harshest judgment I dish out is aimed inward. But when I treat myself with a little more patience, a little more kindness, I find I have more to give others too.

We’re not going to stop judging, it’s part of how we make sense of the world. But we can change what we do with that judgment. We can pause, breathe, and open the door to something much more meaningful: understanding.